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ENRON EXECS
NEED YOUR HELP!

(sent to poontoon from a friend)

Dear kindhearted friends ...

Now that the holiday season has passed, please look into your heart to help those in need. Enron executives in our very own country are living at or just below the seven-figure salary level ... right here in the land of plenty. And as if that weren't bad enough, they will be deprived of it as a result of the bankruptcy and current SEC investigation.

But now, you can help! For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost of a large-screen projection TV), you can help an Enron executive remain economically viable during his time of need.

HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING? Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the executive you sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. You'll also get information on how he plans to invest his golden parachute. Imagine the joy as you watch your executive's portfolio double or triple! Plus upon signing up for this program, you will receive a photo of the executive . Put the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples' suffering.

HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING? Your Enron executive will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants to help in a time of need. Although the executive won't know your name, he will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator just in case additional funds are needed for unexpected expenses.

YES, I WANT TO HELP! I would like to sponsor an Enron executive. My preference is checked below:
[ ] Mid-level Manager
[ ] Director
[ ] Vice President (Higher cost; please specify which department)
[ ] President (Even higher cost; please specify which department)
[ ] CEO (Contribution: Average Enron janitor monthly salary x 700)
[ ] Entire Company
[ ] I'll sponsor an Exec most in need. Please select one for me.

SPECIAL LIMITED TIME OFFER Already an Enron supporter? Don't worry, in this troubled economy, there are many executives who need your help. Ford today is laying off 35,000. The NASDAQ is deflated. Now you can show your patriotism and do something about it.

*It's just that easy -- do it now!*
Please charge the account listed below ___________ per day and send me a picture of the Enron executive I have sponsored, along with my very own Enron "Keep America Strong, Sponsor an Enron Executive: Ask Me How!" T-shirt to wear proudly.
Name: _______________________
Phone :_______________________
[ ] MC [ ] Visa [ ] AmEX [ ] Discover
Number: _______________________
Exp. Date:_______
Signature: _______________________

Contributions are not tax-deductible.

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